Why Do Married Men Go Back to Their Ex: A Closer Look Into the Psychology Behind It

It’s a fact of life that relationships can be complicated, and that includes marriages. While many couples are able to build healthy and lasting partnerships, others find themselves struggling to make things work. Sometimes, married men may even choose to turn back to their ex-partners for various reasons. This can be a difficult situation for both the men and their current partners, and can raise a number of questions about loyalty, commitment, and the true nature of love. There are many factors that can contribute to this decision, from unresolved emotional baggage to issues with communication and compatibility. As we explore the reasons why married men go back to their ex, it’s important to consider the complexity of romantic relationships and the many factors that can influence our decisions and behaviors.

Why Do Guys Go Back to Their Ex Wives?

Some guys like the stability that their ex provided in their lives. Relationships, especially long-term ones, tend to develop a predictable routine that some people become comfortable with. It’s not uncommon for people to enjoy the familiarity of the same faces and routines that they’d grown accustomed to, especially during moments of stress or uncertainty in their lives.

In some cases, couples who’ve been apart for a while may be visibly different from when they were together. It’s common for people to reflect on their past and think about the possibilities of having a second chance at things. The idea of righting wrongs, forgiving past mistakes, and building something new can be very appealing to many individuals.

Another reason why men go back to their ex-wives is that they feel that no one else understands them as well as their former partner. Some men might have trouble opening up emotionally, and if they felt that their wives knew them the best, they may feel the urge to reconnect with them. Alternatively, there may have been something unique about their former spouse that no other woman can match up to.

Ultimately, getting back with an ex depends on a lot of factors, and what was a good fit before may no longer be the case. People change, and it’s important to recognize that some differences may be too significant to overcome. It’s essential to ask yourself if the reasons for wanting to reconcile are solid and if the past behaviors that led to the breakup have been addressed. Finally, communication is key to understanding each others expectations and ensuring that everyone is on the same page.

The Psychological Factors Behind Why Some People Have a Hard Time Moving on From Their Exes

  • Fear of being alone
  • Feeling of insecurity
  • Obsessive thoughts about the ex
  • Nostalgia for the past
  • Attachment to the idea of the relationship
  • Unresolved emotions and grief
  • Lack of closure

Understanding the reasons why people rekindle a past romance can be a complex and emotional topic. While some may see it as a sign of weakness or poor judgment, others believe that returning to an old flame can be a way to rediscover love and find closure. However, one common theme that emerges in many cases is the power of lingering feelings. Despite time and distance, some relationships never truly die, and the desire to reconnect with a former partner can be irresistible.

Why Do People Go Back to Their Exes?

Lingering feelings can arise for a variety of reasons; perhaps the relationship ended due to a stressful time or miscommunication. In addition, further exploration suggests that people might also go back to an ex for emotional stability. Specifically, research has shown that individuals perceive their ex-partner as more emotionally stable than themselves (Ein-Dor et al., 2011). This reliance on an ex-partner for emotional support and stability can lead individuals to reconcile.

Another reason people might go back to their exes is because of the fear of being alone. It’s not uncommon for individuals to have a hard time being alone, or navigating the world without a partner. Especially after ending their relationship, which can already leave individuals feeling lonely and vulnerable. In some cases, reconciling with an ex-partner can alleviate these feelings and provide a sense of comfort.

On the other hand, some people go back to their ex not because they necessarily want to get back together, but because they want to have sex. Research suggests that individuals are more likely to have sex with an ex-partner if they’ve positive feelings towards them (Lehmiller et al., 2013). This desire for sex with an ex-partner can complicate things even further, as it might lead to further confusion or a potential “friends with benefits” situation.

However, lingering feelings and emotional stability tend to be the most commonly cited reasons for reconciliation.

How to Heal After a Breakup

Recovering from a split can be difficult, but here are a few things you can do to ease the healing process. Give yourself enough time to grieve, talk to someone about your emotions or see a therapist, avoid contacting your ex, concentrate on self-care, focus on improvements, and find ways to improve your mood and outlook, such as finding new hobbies or activities that bring you pleasure.

Source: Why do people often go back to their ex, when there are …

Understanding the odds of an ex returning after a breakup can help individuals cope with the process and potentially prepare for the possibility of reconciliation. However, it’s also important to acknowledge that each situation and relationship is unique, and there’s no guarantee that an ex will come back.

What Percentage of Exes Try to Come Back?

According to relationship experts, around 40% of exes try to come back after a breakup. This percentage may vary depending on various factors, including the length of the relationship, how it ended, and how long the couple has been apart. However, it’s important to note that not all exes who try to come back do so with genuine intentions of rekindling the relationship.

While some may still have feelings for their ex-partner and want to give the relationship another try, others may come back out of sheer loneliness or wanting the comfort and familiarity of their previous relationship. Some exes may also try to come back as a way to manipulate or control their former partner, which can be dangerous and toxic.

For those who’re considering getting back with an ex, it’s important to carefully evaluate the reasons for the breakup and whether or not those issues have been resolved. It’s also important to consider whether or not the relationship was healthy and whether or not both partners are willing and able to work on themselves and the relationship.

Reasons Why Some Exes May Not Come Back After a Breakup

  • They’ve moved on and found someone else.
  • They aren’t willing to forgive or forget the reasons for the breakup.
  • They feel hurt and resentful towards their ex.
  • They realize that the relationship was not healthy for them.
  • They don’t want to repeat past mistakes and think it’s best to move on.
  • They may have a fear of commitment or intimacy.
  • They’ve lost interest or attraction towards their ex.
  • They may have different life goals or values that aren’t compatible.
  • They may feel that they’ve outgrown the relationship.
  • They may need time to heal and work on themselves before considering any type of reconciliation.

It’s never easy to see your ex move on, but it can be especially painful when they return to an old flame. While it may feel like a betrayal, it’s important to remember that this behavior is often just a form of rebounding – a way for your ex to distract themselves from their heartbreak and find comfort in something familiar. Understanding why your ex might be reaching out to their former partner can help you navigate your own emotions and move forward in a healthy way.

What Does It Mean When Your Ex Goes Back to Their Ex?

Maybe they’re feeling lonely and don’t want to deal with the uncertainty of having to start anew with someone else. It can also be said that there’s a sense of familiarity with their ex, and an easier way of communication and understanding. This familiarity is something that can be very comforting during a difficult time.

However, it’s important to keep in mind that going back to an ex doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re happy or that the relationship will work out. Sometimes, people forget why they broke up in the first place and romanticize the past. Or maybe they’ve unresolved feelings for their ex that they didn’t fully acknowledge before the relationship ended.

Nevertheless, it’s important to take a step back and assess the situation objectively. It may also be necessary to set boundaries for yourself and decide how much you want to be involved in your exs life moving forward.

It’s important to remember that breakups can be difficult for everyone involved, and often times, people may not make the best decisions in their grief. At the end of the day, everyone deserves to be with someone who values and respects them. So if your ex is going back to their ex, it’s worth considering if this is the kind of treatment you want and deserve in your own relationships.

Signs That Your Ex May Be Considering Going Back to Their Ex

  • Suddenly starts talking about their ex more often.
  • Keeps in touch with their ex frequently.
  • Hides their phone or computer when you’re around.
  • Gets defensive when you ask about their ex or their communication with them.
  • Starts making excuses to spend time alone or away from you.
  • Becomes distant and less affectionate towards you.
  • Makes plans with their ex behind your back.
  • Brings up past issues or fights that involve their ex.
  • Stops making an effort to work on your relationship.
  • Actively avoids getting more serious with you.

It’s natural for a person to feel a sense of loss or longing for someone they were once romantically attached to. Some may even wonder if these feelings resurface after getting married. So, do men miss their exes after marriage? Let’s explore this question together.

Do Men Miss Their Exes After Marriage?

When one half of the relationship suddenly ends things, it’s only natural to feel a void in ones life. Imagine being with someone for months or years and then not being able to talk to them, see them or share a moment with them. It can be heartbreaking. And the after-effects may last for a long time, even if one or both parties have moved on with their lives.

For men, the feeling of missing their ex is no different. They may have a harder time expressing it or showing it, but deep down, they may still have thoughts about their ex. It doesn’t mean that they regret getting married or that they want to rekindle things with their ex, it’s just a feeling of longing for what once was.

Plus, certain life events can trigger those feelings of missing their ex. For instance, if they see a picture of their ex on social media, or if they run into them unexpectedly. It could also happen during a particularly rough patch in their marriage, where they find themselves reminiscing about the past and the comfort they once had with their ex.

In fact, some men may even use those feelings as a way to strengthen their current relationship. They may use the memories of their ex as a reminder of what they never want to go through again, or they could use it as a way to appreciate their current spouse even more. It’s all about how one chooses to deal with those emotions.

Ultimately, the important thing is to communicate with your partner and be honest about any feelings or thoughts that may come up. Keeping things bottled up or hidden can lead to bigger problems down the line. And if the feelings of missing your ex become too overwhelming, seeking professional help may be a good option to work through those emotions.

It’s no secret that breakups can be difficult and emotionally taxing for both parties involved. While some may be able to pick themselves up and move on quickly, others may find it much harder to let go. When it comes to men getting over their ex-wives, there are many factors that come into play. Let’s take a closer look.

Does a Man Ever Get Over His Ex Wife?

It’s not uncommon for a man to hold on to feelings of longing for their former spouse. This could arise from a deep connection that was formed with their ex, making it harder to let go of their shared history. It may also stem from a sense of failure or abandonment, which could lead to a struggle to move on after the relationship ends.

In addition to emotional reasons, practical factors can also prolong a mans ability to let go of their ex. This may include shared custody of children, complex financial arrangements or property ownership. It can be difficult to completely move on when these elements tie the ex-partners together, especially if the separation was tumultuous or difficult.

However, it’s important to note that many men do eventually move on from past relationships and build healthy, happy lives without their ex. While the process can be difficult and take time, focusing on personal growth and new experiences can help increase the likelihood of moving forward.

Ultimately, the key to moving on is to acknowledge and process the emotions that arise after a relationship ends. Whether it’s through therapy, journaling or spending time with friends and family, finding healthy ways to cope can help a man heal and move forward. It’s important to take the time and space necessary to truly process the loss of a relationship, practice self-care and stay mindful of boundaries with an ex in order to successfully move on.

Gender Roles and Societal Expectations of Men After a Divorce

  • Men are expected to be strong and resilient after a divorce
  • They’re expected to provide financially for themselves and any children that may be involved
  • They may face pressure to immediately start dating again to prove their masculinity
  • There’s often stigma attached to men who express vulnerability or emotions related to the divorce
  • These societal expectations can cause men to feel lonely, isolated, and unsupported during the divorce process


It could be due to unresolved feelings and lingering emotions, the need for validation, familiarity, or a strong sense of connection they share with their ex. However, it’s important to note that going back to an ex while being married isn’t only unfair but also unethical and could cause serious damage to the current relationship. Therefore, it’s important for married men to focus on building a healthy, thriving, and fulfilling relationship with their current partner instead of going back to the past. Communication, honesty, and commitment are key to maintaining a strong and fulfilling relationship.