Friends Who Only Contact You When It Suits Them: Red Flags You Shouldn’t Ignore

Having friends is an essential aspect of our lives. They’re the ones we lean on during tough times, make memories with, and share experiences. Despite the joy of having friends, some relationships can become one-sided, and this often means that they only contact us when it suits them. It's a common phenomenon where these individuals show up out of the blue, asking for a favor or an invitation to an event, but are nowhere to be seen when you need support. Recognizing that you may have such friends can be hurtful, and it can be challenging to navigate how to deal with them. This situation begs the question, how do we handle these types of friendships while maintaining our emotional well-being?

How to Deal With a Friend Who Only Talks to You When They Need Something?

Having a friend who only contacts you when they need something can be frustrating and emotionally draining. It can also make you feel used and undervalued as a person. If you find yourself in this situation, the first step to take is to acknowledge your feelings and assess your relationship with this friend. Do they make an effort to stay in touch with you, or are they solely focused on their needs?

If you determine that your friend is only using you, it’s important to be honest with them. Explain how you feel and let them know that their behavior isn’t acceptable. It’s possible that they don’t even realize what theyre doing and may need to be confronted before they can change. You may need to set boundaries, such as only making plans when it’s mutually beneficial or limiting the amount of time you spend helping them.

It’s also important to consider the reasons behind your friends behavior. Are they going through a difficult time and only reaching out when they need support? Or are they simply taking advantage of you? Understanding their motivations can help you determine how to proceed. If your friend is struggling, you may want to offer your support and try to help them. However, if they don’t seem to care about your friendship and are only interested in what you can do for them, it may be time to reassess the relationship.

Remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and treated as an equal in the friendship. While it may be difficult to confront your friend, standing up for yourself will ultimately benefit you both. It’s important to communicate openly and honestly and be willing to compromise. Ultimately, the best outcome is to find a way to make the friendship mutually beneficial for both parties.

Understanding why some friends may not reach out can be reassuring for those who feel left out. It’s important to keep in mind that there are a variety of non-personal reasons why friendships may lack communication. Some individuals may feel uncomfortable or shy about initiating conversations, which can lead to a lack of contact without any ill intent.

Is It Normal for Friends to Not Reach Out?

Friendship is a valuable and often significant part of our lives, providing us with companionship, support, and a sense of belonging. However, sometimes our friends may not reach out to us as frequently as we’d like, which can leave us feeling neglected or disconnected. It’s normal for friends to not always reach out, as each person has their own unique circumstances and reasons for their actions.

For some people, initiating conversation or reaching out to others can be challenging or even overwhelming. If your friend falls into this category, it may not be that they don’t care about you or value your friendship, but rather that they struggle with initiating contact.

Another potential factor that could contribute to a friend not reaching out is social anxiety. People who experience social anxiety may feel uncomfortable or anxious when interacting with others, often feeling like they don’t know what to say and worrying about how they’ll be perceived. This can make initiating conversations or reaching out to others feel daunting and anxiety-provoking.

In some cases, individuals may struggle with social cues and have trouble knowing how to start or maintain a conversation. They may feel uncertain about what to say to a friend and worry about coming across as awkward or uninteresting.

If a friend is struggling with their mental health, grieving a loss, or dealing with other challenges, they may withdraw from social interaction and become less communicative. In these cases, it’s important to respect their need for space and offer support if they’re open to it.

How to Make New Friends and Expand Your Social Circle

  • Join social clubs that interest you, like book clubs, hiking groups, or volunteer organizations.
  • Attend local events and festivals to meet new people.
  • Use social media to connect with people with similar interests.
  • Try a new hobby or activity where you can meet like-minded individuals.
  • Attend networking events in your industry or field.
  • Take a class or workshop to learn a new skill and meet new people.
  • Reach out to acquaintances and ask to hang out or grab coffee.
  • Attend a meetup or group gathering related to a shared interest.
  • Volunteer or participate in community events to meet new people.

Why Do People Only Contact Me When They Need Something?

They may also just simply lack social skills or awareness of proper communication etiquette. It’s possible that they don’t realize their behavior is detrimental or bothersome to you. Some individuals may have a habit of only reaching out to others when they require assistance or resources, rather than building a deeper connection with them.

Another reason people may only contact you when they need something could be tied to their own insecurities or fear of rejection. They may feel more comfortable reaching out to someone who they believe won’t reject them or say no, because they need to ask for something. This dynamic can create an unbalanced relationship that isn’t sustainable in the long-term.

It’s important to set boundaries and communicate your needs with these individuals, so that you aren’t always the one being taken advantage of. Building and maintaining healthy relationships means having mutual respect and a willingness to be there for each other, not just when it’s convenient. It’s also important to evaluate the types of relationship you have, and if you find that most people in your life only contact you when they need something, it may be time to re-evaluate those connections.

In some cases, it may also be a sign that you need to work on your own self-worth and self-esteem. If you find that you consistently attract people who only take from you, it’s important to look inward and identify why this pattern is happening. It may be helpful to seek out therapy or counseling to work through these issues and develop a stronger sense of self-worth.

Understanding the Role of Communication in Building and Maintaining Relationships

  • Effective communication is necessary for building and maintaining relationships.
  • Good communication skills help individuals convey their thoughts, feelings, and emotions effectively.
  • Active listening is an important aspect of communication in relationships as it shows respect and understanding.
  • Clear and concise communication helps avoid misunderstandings and conflicts in relationships.
  • Nonverbal communication, such as body language and tone of voice, also plays a vital role in building relationships.
  • Communication is a two-way process, and it’s important to be receptive and responsive to others’ communication.
  • Effective communication also involves being able to communicate assertively and respectfully in conflicts or disagreements.
  • Technology has changed how individuals communicate, and it’s important to adapt to different communication channels in relationships.
  • Good communication skills can improve overall relationship satisfaction and lead to stronger, healthier relationships.

Keeping in touch with friends is important for maintaining relationships and a sense of community, but it can be tough to know how often to reach out to different types of friends. While there are no hard and fast rules, generally it’s a good idea to stay in contact with close friends more frequently than casual acquaintances. In the following sections, we’ll explore some tips for determining how often to keep in touch with the people in your life.

How Often Should Friends Keep in Touch?

With the rise of social media and the constant connectivity afforded by technology, it can be easy to assume that keeping in touch with friends is as simple as liking a post or sending a quick message. However, true connections require more than just digital interactions. In order to maintain healthy and meaningful friendships, it’s essential to prioritize regular communication and genuine connections.

For close friends, weekly check-ins can help ensure that you stay up to date on each others lives and offer support when needed. Whether it’s a phone call, a video chat, or an in-person meeting, taking the time to connect on a deeper level can help strengthen your bond and improve your mental health. When life gets busy, it can be tempting to let these interactions slip, but setting aside dedicated time each week can help keep your friendship alive and thriving.

For more casual friends, reaching out once a month can help you maintain a positive relationship without taking up too much time or energy. This can be as simple as sending a text or making plans to grab a cup of coffee. By staying in touch regularly, you can develop a stronger sense of mutual respect and trust, which can come in handy when you need help or support down the line.

When it comes to acquaintances or less close friends, it’s important to prioritize quality over quantity. While you may not need to reach out as often, it’s important to make an effort to connect at least twice a year. This can help you maintain positive relationships with people in your network, while also giving you the opportunity to deepen your connections over time. Whether you attend a social event together or reach out with a thoughtful message, these small interactions can go a long way in improving your overall well-being and sense of community.

Of course, the frequency of communication will vary depending on your individual preferences and circumstances. Some people may prefer more frequent check-ins, while others may be content with less frequent interactions. The key is to be intentional about your communication, making time for the people who matter most to you and cultivating relationships that bring joy and meaning to your life.

Ultimately, keeping in touch with friends isn’t just a matter of routine or obligation – it’s an essential aspect of our social and emotional well-being. Whether youre catching up with an old friend or reaching out to make a new one, remember that small gestures of kindness and connection can have a big impact on the quality of your relationships and your overall happiness.

Source: How often should I call/text friends I don’t see everyday?..

Maintaining friendships can be challenging, and sometimes, it’s not easy to understand why your friends rarely talk to you. It’s important to understand that personal challenges can impact friendships, and there might be various reasons why your friend may be distant. It’s crucial to handle the situation with sensitivity and empathy. So, in this article, we’ll explore some possible reasons why your friends may not be talking to you and how to deal with the situation to maintain healthy friendships.

Why Do My Friends Rarely Talk to Me?

Whatever the reason may be, it’s important to remember that every individual goes through tough personal challenges at some point in their lives. So, it’s critical to be patient and understanding with your friend during these times. You should consistently reach out to them, offer support, and let them know that youre there for them whenever theyre ready.

Another reason why your friends might rarely talk to you is that they may be going through a busy period in their lives. Sometimes, people get incredibly busy with work, family, or other commitments, and they might not have the time or energy to chat. In this case, it’s important to respect their boundaries and give them space. But you can always send them messages checking in on them or organize a time to catch up when theyre free.

Additionally, it’s possible that you and your friends have just grown apart over time. People change, and sometimes, friendships just naturally evolve into something else. If this is the case, it’s essential not to take it personally. Theres no need to force a friendship thats not working out, and it’s always better to let it go and focus on building new relationships.

However, if you believe that theres been a significant misunderstanding or miscommunication between you and your friends, it’s always best to initiate an open and honest conversation. Discuss your concerns with them and try to resolve any issues together. Communication is an essential aspect of any relationship, and it can do wonders in resolving conflicts.

You can always take the initiative to reach out to them and let them know that youre there for them. If their non-communication persists, it’s essential to recognize that it’s not a reflection of your worth or character, and you can always focus on building new relationships and finding people who truly value your presence and companionship. Remember, you deserve to surround yourself with people who respect and cherish you.

As we go through life, it’s common for our relationships with friends to change and evolve. Sometimes we drift apart or lose touch altogether, and that’s okay. It’s a natural part of growing up and navigating life’s many transitions. However, it’s important to remember that while friendships may shift, there’s always room to rekindle old connections if and when the time is right.

Is It Normal to Not Keep in Touch With Friends?

As we grow up, our lives take different paths and we become busy with work, family, and other obligations. It’s natural that we lose touch with some friends as a result. However, it’s important to remember that friendships are important and can add value to our lives. Even if we don’t keep in touch with old friends as much as we used to, it’s still important to make an effort to maintain those relationships.

It can be hard to keep in touch with friends who live far away or have different schedules. However, with modern technology, it’s easier than ever to stay connected. Social media, texting, and video calls can help bridge the distance and keep friendships alive. Even if we cant see our friends in person, we can still share our lives and support each other from afar.

Of course, it’s not always easy to maintain friendships, especially when were going through tough times. When were struggling with our own problems, it can be hard to keep up with the lives of others. However, it’s important to remember that friendships are a two-way street. If we want to have strong, lasting relationships, we need to be there for our friends as much as theyre there for us.

Sometimes, friendships naturally come and go. This can be hard to accept, but it’s a part of life. People change, priorities shift, and we all have to move on at some point. However, we can still cherish the memories and lessons we learned from those friendships, even if theyre no longer a part of our daily lives.

It’s normal to not keep in touch with friends as much as we used to. Life is busy and we all have different priorities. Even if we cant see our friends in person, we can still stay connected through technology and make an effort to maintain those relationships.

How to Make New Friends When Old Ones Drift Away.

Making new friends after old ones drift away can be challenging but it’s important to find common interests and hobbies to connect with others, join clubs or groups that align with your passions, and attend social events where you can meet new people. It’s also important to be open, kind, and approachable in order to build strong and lasting relationships.


In conclusion, friendships are an essential part of our lives, but it’s crucial to understand that not all friendships are genuine. While we may value the companionship of those around us, we must also acknowledge whether or not they’ve our best interests at heart. It can be challenging to admit that someone we care about may not be as invested in the friendship as we are, but it’s essential to recognize this. Ultimately, true friends should be there for us through thick and thin, and they shouldn’t only contact us when it suits them. It's worth cultivating meaningful relationships that offer mutual support, shared interests, and trust. In doing so, we can build a strong sense of community and find comfort in knowing that we’ve people in our lives who genuinely care about us.